Do we have to become a grumpy old man (or woman)?

Everyone laughed when my son gave me a pair of ‘grumpy old man’ socks this Christmas.

I laughed too, but now I’m wondering. Do I have to or want to be stereotyped as a sufferer of this irritable male syndrome?

Indeed, it’s an entrenched notion given the comic characters, films and merchandise which send up the ‘GOM’.

But do we older males want to become such a creation if we can avoid it? 

A small book I found these holidays changed my mind and given it’s about two famous psychologists it might challenge yours too.

I’ve played up the grumpy old man role complaining about social media, celebrity culture, poorly written English (!), modern music, etc.

But in that we can unknowingly move closer to that we would prefer to shun, i.e. a bore I was shaken by an idea called ‘ageing and growth.’

Staying with pals, I idly picked up a slim paperback about the German psychologist Carl Jung whose reputation flourished as he grew old in the 1950s.

He believed ageing need not be a time of decline, but refinement and its goal was not senility but wisdom. In short: personality development is not just for the young, it occurs throughout life.

What really struck me was the suggestion that as Jung aged, he became more genial while his one-time mentor Freud became more argumentative and yes, grumpy.

The book Jung, a very short introduction, says, “ Those who came to visit or consult with him (Jung) were impressed as much by his courtesy and humour as by his wisdom and quality of his mind.”

The end of Freud’s life was full of falling out with friends and colleagues as he had a tendency, as the book says, to look back while Jung looked forward.

I claim no great knowledge of these two, but the idea you don’t just become a grumpy old man and may have a choice in the matter is intriguing.

The stereotype is funny and ridiculous, but it doesn’t have to be accurate for the individual who recognises it in themselves—yes, there can be grumpy old women too.

I’m not suggesting we all need Jungian, or perish the thought, Freudian psychoanalyses to banish the GOM within, but a little reflection can only help.

I can now wear my grumpy old man socks not with pride but as a reminder not to unknowingly become one.

How about you? Do you fear becoming a GOM, or are you a fully paid-up member already?